So I’m stressed out this morning! It sucks. I have a ton to do today. And I’m dreading calling my grandparents telling them that I won’t make our weekly visit today because I’m so behind on my work. And I feel guilty because the reason I’m behind is because I spent all day yesterday at my friend’s house watching football! And I need today to catch up. It’s an hour drive there, and then even if we only stay for three hours, with an hour drive back, that’s five hours. Plus 30-60 minutes getting ready. Which means if I stopped blogging at this very moment, I could reasonably get one or two things read and prepped for for tomorrow or I could get my work out in. Either way, it means not a lot done. And when we would get home then, it would be time for me to start cooking, so we’re looking at reasonably, three hours of work for the whole day total (because I don’t usually get more than an hour of work done after dinner–I’m usually too tired), and it would most certainly mean if I worked now, then the work out would not happen at all. Really, obviously it’s a no brainer if I want to get everything done that I want to do, I stay home and disappoint the g’parents, but I think it has to be that way. And of course I feel bad because if I hadn’t gone out Friday night then I wouldn’t have been too tired yesterday and if I hadn’t gone out yesterday then I’d have my work done and could go over there. Although perhaps I should have known better.
So I’m stressed. While I had a really fun weekend, it has not gone as planned. At all. I think part of it has to do with my not working out first thing in the morning (although last week there were some conditions that kept me from sleeping at night resulting in my sleeping in the in the morning–restless dog driving me nuts, sad news from a friend that kept me up, and the like) which means that I work out in the afternoon, but anyway the point is that while I’ve felt good about some of the things I’ve accomplished this week, I’m clearly working on some organization issues. And honestly, I think half weeks can be more stressful in terms of prep than full weeks. Unless perhaps if it’s a M-W half week with T & F off rather than the other way around. Or not.
I just don’t feel like traveling today–even if it is only one hour–clearly this is more of a pep talk to myself rather than anything else.
I’m so tired this morning. Mostly because we were out late and I had a lot of beer yesterday afternoon–granted it was super duper like extremely light beer, but I drank a lot of it early in the day. I’m not hungover, just more tired this morning than I should be. And in all honesty, I just feel mopey, tired, and sad this morning. I want to go back to bed and not work, but that’s not smart either.
Oddly because it’s a warmish grey morning that feels like spring outside, it feels like a day for soul searching. Maybe it’s the depressants in the alcohol. Maybe it’s the feelings of guilt I’m having over having to tell the g’parents that I won’t make it there today. Maybe it’s because I’m just dreading doing anything today and I’m acting like a five year old who’s on the verge of throwing a temper tantrum because she doesn’t want to be responsible for anything today other than lying on the couch and napping. Oy, and I’ve got an abstract to write by the end of the week, too. Shit.
I guess that means that I need to go figure out my day and my week so I can stay on top of things here without getting too overwhelmed. All right. It’s to do list making time, and then it’s work time.